Signs your TV is too loud

Wednesday, February 21st, 2007 | You Call This News?

Man Attacked with Sword While Watching Porn

The lede and first graf (which is really all you need to know), in case the link goes away:

An Oconomowoc man heard a neighbor watching an adult film, but mistakenly thought a woman was being raped.

Bret Stieghorst was watching an adult movie with the volume up loud. His downstairs neighbor, James Van Iveren, heard a woman screaming in the movie, but thought a woman was actually being attacked. Instead of calling police, he took matters into his own hands, ran up the stairs and broke down the door, all while brandishing a three foot long military-style sword.

Second story, including photo of the swordsman, from today’s paper.

Insert your own “3-foot-long sword” jokes here.

8 Comments to Signs your TV is too loud


!! WOW !! And I thought we had “Wild West Justice” in New Mexico !!


things any story beginning with “An Oconomowoc man…” will never continue:

…has peaceful night at home playing Scrabble…

…wins Nobel Peace Prize…

…wins gun safety award…

…computes fibonacci number to one-trillionth digit…


The monk and I saw this on the news last night and this morning and couldn’t figure out which part of it was the most horrifying — the loud porn (god, I hate loud neighbors), the scary swordsman whose pupils were so dilated he looked like he had black buttons for eyes, or the fact that the porn-watching dumbass was inviting camera crews into his home to talk about the incident…


And in that last moment of a noble gesture gone tragically wrong, the cops confiscated the sword…
(By the way, Zorro was living with his mom.)


*sigh* – some people just can’t come up with an original idea for a blog post…

czeltic girl

Heh. Oh, I suspect every blogger in Wisconsin grabbed this story yesterday. How can you pass up comedy gold like this?

Pete Prodoehl

Hey, I got in on the follow-up:

and in other news, “An Oconomowoc man fell through the ice into Fowler Lake…”

czeltic girl

Woo hoo. Your name in print. Well, kind of…

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